Woke up late this morning - like 1 1/2 hours late. My tailbone is killing me. I missed my morning appointment. It rained, it poured buckets. I'm tired. I need to go to bed. My tailbone is killing me. I worked an extra hour at work. Emma had a soccer game (they won, 3 to 2). The kitten won't stop climbing on the computer keyboard. And I still need to go out in the barn and clean stalls and fill water buckets before I can go to bed. And my tailbone is killing me. Blah, blah, blah...
I injured myself about 10 years ago. I tore all the muscle off one side of my tailbone. It was absolute torture. It took about 6 weeks before I could actually go from sitting down to standing up (or vice versa) without feeling like I was going to pass out or throw up from the pain.
It's bbbaaaacccckkkk. I don't know what I did last night, but when I woke up this morning I couldn't even get out of bed. And today, working at the library, getting up and down to the copier, the books, the check out desk... ohy, vey.
So, now I'm headed out to do barn chores. In the rain. :( I just want to sit down and cry.
Talking about crying, I have a funeral to go to this weekend. A very good friend of mine found her soul mate. They are both older in life, having been college sweethearts and then going their separate ways, only to find each other and that romantic spark, again....
Then he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. And he beat it. Got a clean bill of health. Got married :) and at his 6 week follow up was diagnosed with cancer in the liver (if I remember correctly). They gave him 4 to 6 months to live. He lived almost a year after that. He just passed away last weekend.
I've been humbled by many, many things in my life, but when R and his wife, B, wanted to come to our monthly cookout - as one thing he wanted to cross of his 'bucket list' - I was overwhelmed and honored.
It was a wonderful cookout. And, not knowing, we even had his favorite dessert, strawberry shortcake. He was gone less than two weeks later. I wanted to stop by and see them the week after the cookout, but I just couldn't make myself stop. I've been to too many funerals already this year. I really can't do another one. But I will. Because B was there for me and my girls when I went through a difficult time a few years ago. Because even though R didn't know me very well, he was always inquiring about how I was, how things were going, encouraging me, treating me as if I were a long lost friend that he truly cared about. Caring about me, my family, my animals, my girls... and truly sharing his love, life and self with my friend B.
R will be missed. I still can't believe he's gone. I'm so glad he is no longer in pain or suffering, but am so sorry for the loss for B.
Ok. Now if I go out to do barn chores in the rain, no one will know if it is rain or tears running down my face. Off to snuggle with my equine shoulders to cry on.
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