Responsible Animal 'Ownership'

Warning ~ this post is not for the faint of heart or those of you who are sympathetic animal lovers. It discusses certain subjects that can bring about sadness, tears and make you want to eat lots of chocolate and take naps to avoid yourself and the world. That is what I am going to be doing during and after this post.

Responsible Animal 'Ownership'

First, I must say that I don't feel like I 'own' my animals. Most assuredly they think they rule my house and own the chair I like to sit on and, begrudgingly, vacate it so I can sit down and let them drape all over me. I use that term because, well, it's the one that is mostly used and clearly defines my responsibility. I own my car, I pay for the gas, I get the oil changed when it needs it and give it a tune up or new tires when necessary. Similar to my animals. When they need something - their shots, deworming, food, baths, trips to the vets - it is what I do. They are under my care and I do care for all of them.

Now for the hard part. Get your box of kleenex and a trash can and sit it beside you.

I am NOT a morning person. For those of you that know me, I rarely, without good reason, like to creak my way out of bed in the morning, stumble down the stairs and fumble my way through making the first pot of coffee for the day. If coffee is made (thanks Cameron!!) then my world is already looking up. I like to putter around the house, feed the dogs, let them out, feed the horses and chickens and let them out, check my favorite blogs, get something to eat for breakfast, read my email, all before I start responding to phone calls or emails or talking to anyone. Not that I am necessarily a bear, just a slow, quite starter.

This Monday morning, however, I am awake before the phone rings at 8 am. Its the backhoe guy. Telling me he can be here in 1/2 an hour to excavate a hole in the field.

Tommy took a turn for the worse late Friday afternoon. He must have stepped wrong or just over extended his bad leg. He's been on stall rest all weekend but he is in serious pain and unable to hardly put any weight on his front leg. His rear hock is also very swollen and he's spending most of his time lying down.

My second call was to the vet to make arrangements to have him euthanized.

I was worried I wouldn't know when it was time. That I wouldn't be able to tell when I was keeping him here more for me than for him. There is no question as to that decision now. Even with an overabundance of Bute (horse aspirin) he's in serious pain.

I've been rotating the boys in the stall next to him so he won't be lonely. I'm giving him all kinds of treats. I've stopped going in the stall with him as I am afraid if he falls he will pin me between him and the wall/floor. He's that unstable.

So, if you think that getting up Monday morning, early, to make plans to euthanize your horse doesn't ruin your week, then add to that you have to get up early Tuesday morning to have the vet come to do the required medical intervention.

And my boss is gone this week on vacation. Good for her! She works hard. She is such a sweetie. I know she's planning on going to the beach at least two days. It might be a blessing in disguise that I have to work on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. At least it will keep me busy and get me out of the house. It will keep my mind occupied.

My heart is breaking. Tommy was my rescue last year. He was doing so very good. Then the reoccurring lameness. The good news is that he gained back all his weight and had a wonderful year filled with love, clean stalls and plenty to eat. The bad news is that he gained a whole bunch of weight which aggravated the condition in his legs.

I will take one last picture of him tomorrow morning, eating grass, enjoying the sunshine. He is only 14 years old. Way too short a life to have it end this way. At least I am comforted by the fact that he was happy. He was fed. He was loved and groomed and fed treats. He got to enjoy a large stall with clean shavings and plenty of fresh, cool water. Lots of hay. He became greedy for affection and scratches and pushed everyone else out of the way to receive the most attention. He got to be a happy horse.

So, now, he will lay out in the pasture, under Shiloh's favorite napping tree, company with Shiloh, Aba, Chris, Buddy and Elias. I can see them all, together, running through green grass, no pain, no worries, the wind in their manes...

Can't stand it any more... headed for a nap to dream of happy times and to rest my arms from running wire for the new kitchen yesterday and cleaning up the manure pile this morning.

:'(